I finally watched that documentary on clocks.I just paid $100 for a belt that doesn’t fit - what a huge waist!.I was once a personal trainer, until I gave a too-weak notice.My therapist told me I have problems expressing my emotions.Have you heard about the new corduroy pillows - they're making headlines!.I was wondering why the baseball kept getting bigger and bigger.I can tolerate algebra, maybe even a little calculus but geometry is where I draw the line.The wedding was so beautiful, even the cake was in tiers.Every night, I have hard time remembering something, but then it dawns on me.I said it must be my weekend immune system. My boss asked me why I only get sick on work days.I failed my calculus exam because I was sitting in the middle of identical twins - I couldn’t differentiate between them.I used to be able to play piano by ear, but now I have to use my hands.At first, I thought my chiropractor wasn’t any good, but now I stand corrected.I'm reading an anti-gravity book, and I just can't put it down!.We’re renovating the house, and the first floor is going great, but the second floor is another story.A magician was walking down the street - then he turned into a store.I can’t find the words for how much this bugs me. Most people can’t tell the difference between entomology and etymology.I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.If it were served warm, it would be justwater. Mom texted me to say our Italian restaurant is out of pasta, and now we’re penneless.I used to run a dating service for chickens, but I was struggling to make hens meet.I asked him, "What's two minus two?" He said nothing. Whenever you get a bad sausage, it's just the wurst.6:30 is my favorite time of day, hands down.That’s what I get for buying a pure bread dog. Every time I take my dog to the park, the ducks try to bite him.Mom said I should do lunges to stay in shape.I had a dream that I weighed less than a thousandth of a gram.I'm so good at sleeping that I can do it with my eyes closed!.Two peanuts went walking down the street.My dream job is to clean mirrors, because I can really see myself doing that.I only know 25 letters of the alphabet - I just don't know y.I love dad jokes, but I don't have kids, which makes me a Faux Pa.If a pig loses its voice, does it become disgruntled?.I found a wooden shoe in my toilet - it was clogged.She doesn't know I always keep a few Twix up my sleeve. Mom keeps asking why I have so much candy.I hate my job - all I do is crush cans all day.Did you hear that laughing too loudly is illegal in Hawaii? They only permit a-low-ha.Just drop these into a conversation whenever there's a dull moment. One-liners are the most versatile tool in the dad-joke toolbox, because the teller doesn't have to wait for any setup. Looking for more laughs? We have lots of holiday-specific jokes, too, including Christmas jokes, New Year's jokes, Thanksgiving jokes, Halloween jokes, Easter jokes, Father's Day jokes and Valentine's Day jokes - even jokes for Pi Day on March 14! (I'm a case in point: In my family, I am way more likely to drop a dad joke than my husband.) Check out this list of the goofy dad jokes to tell in 2023, and get ready to deploy one the next time you need to disarm a kid with giggles (or groans). They're good for a laugh, but they're mostly going for an eye-roll. The phrase is a misnomer - the true meaning of the phrase "dad joke" doesn't actually have anything to do with the parental status of the deliverer. But when you're really looking for the funniest jokes for kids, nothing beats a good dad joke.Īnd we're not just talking about any funny thing that drops out of a father's mouth. When you're trying to make kids laugh, a good pun might get a single, "Ha!" A knock-knock joke can surprise them, with a a clever twist on a formula. There's just something about dad jokes - they're their own special kind of humor. Best Dad Jokes That Are Responses to Kid Questions.
Best "To The Person Who Stole My." Dad Jokes.